Self Image

I recently participated in the McKlinky blog hop tour on “Encouragement” and posted my favorite quote:

O would some Power

the giftie gie us

to see ourselves

as others see us.

Robert Burns, Poem “To a Louse” – Verse 8

Scottish national poet (1759-1796)

It’s not a mistake that we only see ourselves as a reflection in a mirror. Who we truly are comes from within and not from the outside. If you are feeling in need of a change, maybe today is the day to paint a new self-portrait.

How do most of us gauge our image? We look through the lenses of others. What they see shapes who we are. There is something wrong with that picture for sure.

Let’s think about this for a moment. Everything that we are originates inside of us. Our brain stores memories from our past. It also stores our learned behaviors like riding a bike or walking. An emotional tag is attached to each of these events. There’s no possible way that another human being could have access to those brain imprints.

With that being the case, how can they look at us from the outside and tell us what we should be all about? It’s impossible – what we project comes from who we perceive ourselves to be inside. If someone doesn’t like that then they’re rejecting us.

Rejection is painful, but it is not our pain to bear. The pain belongs to the other person. If they have a problem with what they see in us, there is a problem with their lens. We tend to criticize in others the very traits that we wish we had ourselves. That’s how the green-eyed monster works.

It’s true that sometimes we can have character traits that rub people the wrong way. If you’re too blunt or too indecisive, people may tend to shy away from you. Someone pointing this out will do so from a place of love not criticism. They want the best for you so they take the time to help. That is in sharp contrast to someone whose words cut deep when they are supposed to be “doing it for your own good.”

As humans, we were created to grow and evolve. Part of growth is realizing characteristics that we don’t need anymore and getting rid of them. It is okay to reinvent yourself as long as you’re doing it for the benefit of you and not someone else.

In life we meet very few genuine people. We are usually suspicious of them because we often hide behind a mask ourselves. It is refreshing to know people who are not afraid to be accepting of themselves, flaws and all. They could teach us a thing or two about painting our own self-portrait.

Related Reading:
Woodstock: Part 1 – Talking About My Generation

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